Decorating Diaries - Still Holding On

A friend pointed out to me the other day that I've dropped the ball as far as updating you all on the status of our master bathroom renovations. Apologies all around. Here's the scoop:

It's fair to say that the bathroom is finished. All plumbing is operational, the heated floors work and after 8 1/2 months of tears, threats, lies, and four-letter words sworn into my pillow at night, the contractors are but a memory. Which is not entirely a good thing. We still have no floor divide between our bedroom and bathroom floor and my front bedroom still holds the cabinet and tile samples that belong to said contractor.  Every time I pass them I get an evil urge to dump them.

What the bathroom needs now more than anything are the finishing touches--tissue and toothbrush holders, artwork on the walls, and fluffy new towels in a yet-to-be-determined-color-because-this-whole-process-has-rendered-me
incapable-of-making-even-the-smallest-decision.

I like the bathroom.  I might love it after we add the towels, window coverings, etc.  One thing that bums me out is we forgot to move the showerhead to a higher height. In our old bathroom, the showerhead is VERY low - maybe at the 5'7 level.  In our other bathroom renovation, the plumber moved it to the top of the shower wall so it rains down on us like a shower is supposed to. This one wasn't moved and continues to sort of be at face level for me, chest level for Blair. Poor guy has to about bend in two to rinse shampoo out of his hair.

But really, I think the whole renovation experience put a sour taste in my mouth that given a little time, will dissipate and I'll come to love the bathroom.  

Here's one little problem to be resolved. Look at the photo to the left. There is a large full-length mirror leaning against the back wall of the shower. It's leaning instead of hanging because when we went to drill holes for the screws, we discovered the previous owners had put a metal sheet in the wall.  Our drill can't penetrate it so I suppose I'll call our neighborhood contractor to come hang it for us.

There's always something but overall, I'm pretty pleased. (And thank you, God, that it's over).  

Setting Boundaries

This month and I suspect the upcoming months are going to present a challenge for me in terms of setting boundaries on my time. It's come to my attention that my volunteer and non-paying activities are starting to outnumber and take over my income-producing activities. Someone showed me a T-shirt in a catalog that said, "STOP ME FROM VOLUNTEERING AGAIN!"  That's me.

The problem is, I really like a lot of my non-paying activities. They include:

• Attending a weekly networking meeting
• Participating in a Toastmasters group
• Mentoring two young women as they start their own businesses
•  Reading to middle-grade kids through a disadvantaged youth program
• Teaching Networking skills to women at a non-profit Women's Resource Center
• Serving on the board and as a group facilitator for our local writer's group.
  
• Serving on the board for our local Toastmasters group
• Serving on the board for the International Cat Writers Association
• Attending networking events through our Greensboro Merchants Association
• Meeting with my critique group for children's writers
  
• Blogging
• And soon to include more work on animal rights and establishing a shelter! =)
  

Part of my issue is I think, "Oh, it's only an hour's meeting. I can do that," forgetting to factor in 1 1/2 hours drive time, the fact that meetings run long, and the "to-do" list of things I'll emerge from the meeting with.

I'm taking baby steps to remedy this. I've announced I'm leaving the board of my writers group and stepping down as facilitator.  I'm also (after one more visit, because I promised) going to stop reading to the kids. A good cause, but it's over an hour away and that's just too far. My Toastmasters group asked me just this week if I would serve on the awards committee and mentor a new member and I said no to both. It was hard--I'd love to be on the awards committee and I'd enjoy mentoring a new speaker. But there's just no time.

Some things won't go away because I don't want them to. I love blogging. I love my networking group and my children's writers group. Being on the Board of the Cat Writers brings me contacts and income, since I write for a lot of pet magazines. But I may have to take a hard look at some of the other items.

It's a good problem to have, being interested in so many different things. And it might be a little more manageable if I didn't live so far away.  And it's not that I have a hard time saying no to people as it is I really want to be a part of all these things. But I'd also like a little more balance in my life.  We all would. 

Goodbye, Little Braveheart

In an earlier comment to one of my posts on the kitty, my friend Pam nicknamed him "Braveheart" and I've been mentally calling the kitty that ever since. Which didn't make it any easier when I returned a call to my vet this morning and learned the kitty passed away last night.

We're not sure why. He had blood in his stools which is why they wanted to run more tests. If I heard him right, my vet suspects he may have gotten into some poison, but there's no way to know for sure. And it doesn't really matter. I'm so grateful Blair found him and brought him home and that instead of dying alone, starved and hurting under some bush, he was clean, fed, cared for and had a few days of petting and attention under his belt.

I was upset yesterday that I couldn't find anywhere to place the kitten and Blair suggested maybe he never should have brought him home in the first place but I vehemently disagreed and still do. We can't help every stray but some call to us more than others and we should act on that. That's how Lucy came into my life and there's a reason this kitten came into our lives as well.

I've spent most of the day reflecting on that last point. For over a year now, Blair and I have said we should/need to/are soon going to get involved with the very small group of people in our rural county who are working toward establishing an animal shelter.  But there was always a reason we didn't get involved--time, we forgot about the meeting date, out of town, too tired, we'll go next week, etc., etc. 

I also know that I have a fear of getting involved.  I'm happy to do behind the scenes work - apply for grants, write letters, administration, but I don't know that I can take working with the animals. I'm afraid it will break my heart. So even though animal control and sheltering have always been important to me, I shy away from them out of fear of not being able to handle the emotions that come with it.

I think this kitten helped me move past that fear. I still hurt but I'm pissed as well and ready to do something about it. When I was looking for somewhere to take the kitten, I found the website for the Greensboro animal shelter. I have friends who live in GSO and I was going to ask them to take the kitten there as they wouldn't accept an out-of-county animal. But when I logged on, I pulled up pages and pages and pages and pages of cats already at the shelter waiting to be adopted. I just felt this pit in the bottom of my stomach. It was hopeless. There are animals everywhere waiting for homes and yet people still aren't getting their pets fixed and buying from pet stores (don't EVER buy from a pet store -- they run breeding mills--very unhealthy and unnecessary).

I've blogged a bit in here about how I'm working on setting some goals. One of my goals is to do more public speaking but I've drawn up short each time I try to figure out what I might have to say that people would want to hear. Speaking out on behalf of animal welfare and for spay/neuter controls may be it.

I'm almost done being sad about the kitty. But I believe he appeared and we invited him into our lives for a reason, and I hope I remember that reason in the days/weeks/months to come and don't let the opportunity for growth having little Braveheart in my life presented to me slip away.

Much love and kisses to you, little one.

Things I Don't Know How To Do

No new news on the kitten so we'll take a little break.

I went to CVS this week and bought a cheap digital watch for running. It has the stopwatch feature so I can track my time. And, sadly, over the last few days I have come to realize that I do not have the necessary skills to work this basic, elemental, piece-of-crap watch.

There's some sort of voodoo surrounding me and mechanical things. I read the instructions. I follow directions. But I still can't get anything to work. The watch is but one example of my ineptitude. Here are a few other items I have no clue how to program, operate, and sometimes even turn on:

• Taping a movie on our VCR
• Adjusting the temperature on the heated floor in the bathroom
• Using any of the extra features on the digital camera
• Fixing anything involving our Road Runner connection.
• Adding, deleting or updating programs on our computer
• Downloading I-Tunes (I almost have a grasp of how this works)

The list goes on.  I could choose to be embarrassed over my lack of skills but, eh. I have other skills, such as my amazing ability to spot a cat at 50 yards or my ability to pull together a full meal without ever turning on the stove or opening the fridge. We all of us have our gifts.

Mine just doesn't involve knowing what time it is.